Timelined after Pussyfooting
<Mayday> Mayday tapped the writing pad in front of her, sighing and scratching at her short, red locks. She felt sick just looking at the little list she'd written: she'd honestly written a list to weigh up the pros and cons of Sue and Cassandra.
<Mayday> "You're a horrible person, Mayday Parker...." she mumbled to herself, looking in the Sue bracket on the page: 'I love Susan Storm', it said. The main reason she cared about Sue - Sue loved her right back. She hardly knew Cassandra, so why was she so obsessed with her, anyway?
<Mayday> She hit herself in the head with her knuckles, shortly afterwards wishing she hadn't as she tapped the notepad again. This was wrong on so many levels, but at least Sue was winning out. Whether or not that was a good thing, however, still eluded her.
<@Jean-Paul> Jean-Paul arched an eyebrow as he looked in on Mayday from the doorway. "Why are we abusing yourself in here?" He asked, smiling softly as he came in to sit down by his friend. "And I doubt you're a horrible person, I know you pretty well, after all."
<@Jean-Paul> "So, what are you working on here?" He poked the notebook but didn't read it, sure that Mayday'd share what it was with him.
<Mayday> Mayday slapped the book to her chest, "Don't read that!!!" she screamed, sighing as she took in Jean-Paul from behind her red-framed glasses, "S-sorry, I....I-I can't tell anyone else, I..." she bit her lip, "Oh, God, JP, I've totally screwed up my life..."
<@Jean-Paul> "...with a piece of paper? What's going on?" Jean-Paul asked, absolutely confused by Mayday's reaction. "I doubt you're screwing much up with a piece of paper now."
<Mayday> "You have to swear on your life you won't tell anyone." Mayday begged him, "Ok? Anyone. Even Reed."
<@Jean-Paul> "You realize Reed is basically a vault of information, right?" He nodded though. "You know I won't."
<Mayday> Taking a deep breath, Mayday revealed the page, "I-I...think I have a crush on Cassie." she confessed, "Which is stupid, I know, but....I-I can't understand why, but I do!"
<@Jean-Paul> "...so? People have crushes, that's perfectly normal, Mayday."
<Mayday> "B-but I'm in love with Sue! Is it even legal to do that?" she sighed, "I-I don't mean 'legal', I-I just....ugh...I don't even know..."
<@Jean-Paul> "People have crushes all the time. It's just a crush, it's no big deal at all...hell, you're not telling me this is the only crush you have."
<Mayday> Mayday shrugged, "I...I don't know! I mean...I-I guess people think I have a crush on Professor Drake, b-but that's different! She's married, and she's a teacher, so it doesn't count as the same...I-I think...." she frowned, "...oh, I'm so stupid..."
<@Jean-Paul> "You're just overreacting. So, what's the paper then?" Jean-Paul asked, this time taking the chance to try and get a peek at it.
<Mayday> "I-I er...." she showed him, "I'm....coming up with reasons why I like Sue and Cassie so I can figure out what to do...." she grimaced, "...I'm horrible for saying it like that, huh?"
<@Jean-Paul> "No, it works. Hell, I've done the very same thing with Clarice." He held out his hands for the paper and pencil. "Lets get this thing going then."
<Mayday> Looking up, Mayday offered them to him, "Y-you....did the same thing? With Clarice and who?"
<@Jean-Paul> "She was making a list comparing Remy and Fabian. So shall we start a fresh one?"
<Mayday> Mayday nodded slowly, suddenly feeling a little bit better, "But I'm in love. Shouldn't it not be like this? Like...what if I'm just lying to Sue? A-and I don't even know it?"
<@Jean-Paul> "Mayday, how long have you gone out with Sue?"
<Mayday> "....s-since...erm..." she bit her lip, "...Hallow's." she admitted.
<@Jean-Paul> "So don't you think you're being a bit hard on yourself about five months of being in your first real relationship? I'm not saying you don't love Sue or anything but now that you her have talked about that hwo did that turn out?"
<Mayday> "Well...it turns out she felt the same, she's just got all this stuff about her parents that she's over-complicating us with." she shrugged, "I mean...you know, if my Dad wasn't ok with me being with a girl I'd be upset, but....w-well, it's my choice, you know?"
<@Jean-Paul> "Tell me more about her over-complicating though." He started his own list, scribbling away.
<Mayday> Sitting back, Mayday shrugged again, "I....don't know. She seems very scared that her parents don't approve of her being gay. Also, she gets really mad when people talk about it in public. We....don't really go out much, which is ok 'cause I like being inside, but...." she sighed, rubbing her eyes, "...yeah. I think that's it."
<@Jean-Paul> Jean-Paul's opinion was pretty plain on his face and a few more things were added to the con list. "So you love her, she knows that, everyone knows that, but she's not at the point where she can be comfortable with being with you in a actual relationship?"
<Mayday> "W-well, I-I mean we are in an actual relationship, right?" she scratched her head, "...I-I think we are. A-although she can't tell her parents. And....she hates Hope for outting her. And....she doesn't want anyone to know....really....erm."
<@Jean-Paul> "...I think you just answered that question."
<Mayday> Gulping, Mayday nodded, looking away. Words seemed to be causing her a lot of trouble the last few days.
<Jean-Paul> "Okay, do you have any pros for Cassie?" Jean-Paul asked just to switch gears.
<Mayday> "Erm....well, Cassie's fun. And she's pretty. She helps me train, and likes to go out." Mayday smiled a little, "She's very extroverted and comfy with who she is, which makes me feel a little silly sometimes, but she's nice to me about it. She just likes to experience life, a-and....I like that."
<Jean-Paul> "And the cons?" Jean-Paul added, drumming the pencil on the paper.
<Mayday> Mayday scratched her head again, "She's...kind of promiscuous, so I'm not sure whether she'd even want a relationship realistically. Also, I worry she's quite fickle, so she might just find someone else. She's probably not gay, and if I leave Sue for her, she'll probably think I'm a bitch regardless, right?"
<Jean-Paul> "I'd doubt the last part and you don't need to leave someone for anyone else. You leave someone if they're not right for you, that's the part you need to figure out, then you can worry about what to do afterwards."
<Mayday> "This all seems so sudden - everything was fine before I started talking to Cassie, a-and now...." she groaned, "...I wonder what Commander Femshep would do...."
<Jean-Paul> Jean-Paul shook his head. "Cassie isn't really the problem here, Mayday."
<Mayday> "It's me, huh?"
<Jean-Paul> Jean-Paul sighed, shaking his head. "No, it's not you either. It doesn't sound like, however, you're really getting what you need with Sue so I think you need to talk to her about your relationship and what it is."
<Jean-Paul> "I know she's not as comfortable as you or me with everything and nobody should certainly hurry her or make her say or do anything she doesn't want to do but it's also not fair to you so both of you need to get things straightened out and neither of you should have to settle too much with what your relationship is."
<Mayday> Mayday smiled a little, "...yeah. Yeah, that's....actually making more sense now." she breathed a little laugh, "I'm really glad you explained it. Thank you, Jean-Paul."
<Jean-Paul> "You realize, though, I'm going to be nosing around Cassie now though to judge your crush, yes?" He asked, a happy little smirk on his face. "And still, don't worry about crushes. I mean, Reed knows a whooole lot about what I think about Professor Lehnsherr...and agrees with me so I'm not sure how that works with this."
<Mayday> "Well, it's different for guys." Mayday rolled her eyes, "....isn't it? O-or is it for gay guys too? Erm....aw, man, I have...totally lost where I was going with this." she giggled a little.
<Jean-Paul> "It's the same for everyone. Anyone who tells you any different is just trying to make excuses for themselves or someone else. That's why people say 'I'm married, not dead' and things like that. This kind of thing happens all the time."
<Mayday> "I feel....a lot better." Mayday nodded, still smiling, "Thank you, JP, I really mean it. You're the best." she hopped up and jumped him with a hug, "If you were straight and single, I'd marry you right now."
<Jean-Paul> "Well, if we're ever single together we can get a house and become crazy cat people together if you like." Jean-Paul laughed, gladly hugging his friend.
<Mayday> In sitches, Mayday nodded as she backed out again, "Yeah! That'd be great! Like one of those English comedy couples! But we need a catchphrase...."
<Jean-Paul> Jean-Paul frowned, thinking of what the worst catchphrase could be. "Something about keeping it straight."
<Mayday> "Definitely!" Mayday grinned, "Oh, JP, where would I be without you, hm?" she knelt at his feet, giving his knees a little hug, "My awesome queen!"
<Jean-Paul> "Oh you'd be fine, you know it. I'm just a little good addition to your life."
<Mayday> Mayday poked his nose, "You." she said with a little smile, "Sell yourself too short." she nodded, jumping back to her feet, "So, I should talk to Sue about things, right? Sort them out before....you know, losing my mind?"
<Jean-Paul> "Definitely. I mean, considering she seems a little unsure from what you're saying I wouldn't bring up Cassie or anything but I think you definitely need to talk about the two of you."
<Mayday> "Yeah. Ok." she nodded back, "Just....don't tell her ok? I'm still kicking myself for saying to Cecilia 'cause I'm worried that at this point Fabian knows, which means we'd be one nonchalant shrug off the entire school knowing..." she shuddered at the thought, sitting back in her seat and folding her legs under herself.
<Jean-Paul> "I don't think anyone'd flap their mouths at your expense. I don't think you have much to worry about." He assured her, rubbing her shoulder. "So, should we shred your pros and cons list?"
<Mayday> Nodding, Mayday looked at it, "Yes. We should cast Elfire on that shit right now. Where's Johnny?" she smiled, "Seriously, it needs to die."
<Jean-Paul> "I could speed-rip it to bits for you if you if you like, turn it into a mulch corner for Cinnamon."
<Mayday> "Nobody would ever suspect that..." she nodded, "And besides, best place to hide a leaf is in a forest, right? Or in this case, a miniaturized tropical box."
<Jean-Paul> Jean-Paul ripped the pages out and started shredding them. "Cinnamon is great at evidence disposal, I'm sure."
<Mayday> "I sometimes think he's a robot sent to spy on me." Mayday joked, taking the notepad into her hands and looking at it, "Man, I'm so dumb sometimes: getting all worked up." she wore a wry expression as she looked back at Jean-Paul, "You really saved me from that feeling..."
<Jean-Paul> "It's all right, young grasshopper." Jean-Paul assured her, scooping up all of the paper shreds. "You're still new to all of these warm fuzzies being out in the open."
<Mayday> Mayday sighed, "I guess so....gosh, I almost miss the days when I could hide behind my LoL avatar and pretend the world wasn't happening outside..."
<Jean-Paul> "Then look at what you'd be missing out on now."
<Mayday> "..." Mayday paused on his words for a moment, looking down at the blank paper on the pad, then back at her friend, smile re-forming on her face, "...yeah. Yeah, I guess you're right."
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