12/3 Instance: Flurrious Placation

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Slarti
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Title: Damn Not Given
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12/3 Instance: Flurrious Placation

Post by Slarti »

Timelined after Dehydrated

<Jessica> Jess was glad she'd elected to leave her bike at home when she'd gone to check on the frogs. Most of the roads were near impassable now with the weather, people were abandoning cars on the highway. Even so, it had been difficult to get home with the wind and the poor visibility but she'd managed it and it was with some relief that she closed the door on the blizzard and took off her coat.

<Shaw> Sebastian sensed her first, but just as quickly he heard her. Tossing his phone to the kitchen counter, he met her at the door. "Are you alright? I've been trying to reach you."

<Jessica> "You have?" she hung her coat up and went to him for a hug to warm up. "I think service is patchy because of the weather, I haven't heard my phone..."

<Shaw> "Well, I had no difficulties reaching the school. Lehnsherr informed me a group went out with Danvers. And then, of course, the breaking news of a possible terrorist attack upstate." He caught her in the hug, but not before he took in the familiar black leathery pants and snarled. "Tell me you didn't go."

<Jessica> Jess bit her lip, "It was Hydra..."

<Shaw> Temper rising, he caught her arms, pushing her away from him to see her face. "Jessica! The baby!"

<Jessica> "Ow!" Jess tried to jerk her injured arm out of his grasp, "The baby is fine!"

<Shaw> He dropped her as if he'd been the one stung. For a long moment, he stared at the bandage on her upper arm, at the faint traces of blood. Raising one hand toward the injury, he clenched it into a fist and pulled back when he noticed it was shaking. "Jess..."

<Jessica> She covered the bandage with her left hand, wincing at the renewed pain from the graze. "I'm going to get some ice..."

<Shaw> Swearing under his breath, he shook his head. "I'm sorry, of course I didn't mean to hurt you." He moved her hand and looked at the bandage. "How bad is it?"

<Jessica> "It looks worse than it is... it's just a graze..." she sighed, taking his hand in hers.

<Shaw> "How?" Giving it yet another wary glance, he kissed her hand and then tugged gently, leading her toward the kitchen.

<Jessica> She let him lead her through their new house, "I misjudged their aim..."

<Shaw> "It's a bullet graze?" His voice rose sharply again before he could stop himself.

<Jessica> Jess tensed up as his voice rose and she nodded wordlessly. She didn't need their link to know he was angry.

<Shaw> Sebastian was deathly silent the rest of the way to the kitchen, where he tried and failed to locate something to put ice in for her. He slammed a few cabinet doors and drawers - still mostly empty, then moved to tearing through boxes.

<Jessica> Jess looked for one box in particular, opening it carefully and taking out a dish towel, "This'll do..."

<Shaw> He took it with a nod and went for the freezer, carefully pulling the makeshift ice pack together for her. Finally, he turned back to her. Swallowing harshly, he met her eyes briefly before pressing the pack to her arm.

<Jessica> Jess closed her eyes, drawing in a sharp breath. It was cold and it stung but soon it'd make her arm nice and numb and it wouldn't be a problem anymore. "Thank you...." she mumbled.

<Shaw> "You're welcome." Watching her face, he realized he was still shaking.

<Jessica> Jess caught his free hand with her own, "Are you okay?"

<Shaw> He opened his mouth to answer, but he was unsure of that answer, so he closed it again with a click of teeth. Instead, he shrugged.

<Jessica> She gave his hand a gentle squeeze, "I'm sorry...."

<Shaw> Moving in close, and carefully holding the ice pack to her bandage, he slid his other arm around her.

<Jessica> She bowed her head onto his shoulder, turning her face towards his neck and putting her arms loosely around his waist. "I just... I didn't want to stay behind..."

<Shaw> For a long time, he was still silent; turning his face toward her, breathing in her scent, eyes closed. He swallowed. "You want revenge."

<Jessica> "Of course I want revenge... everyone wants revenge for what she did."

<Shaw> "I understand that, but now..." Sebastian paused, swallowed, working to keep his voice under control, knowing she could likely feel his struggle.

<Jessica> "I know... I know..." she sighed, turning her head to press her face against his shoulder. I couldn't just stay there knowing where they were going...

<Shaw> You have to think of the other life you're endangering.

<Jessica> As long as I look after myself the baby will be fine... and I did look after myself...

<Shaw> You were shot, which is a far cry from fine. Sebastian's hand curled into a fist in the fabric of her shirt.

<Jessica> It's just a flesh wound... and a shallow one at that. Jess pointed out, I am fine.

<Shaw> And if this Hydra agent had better aim? If you'd been less fortunate?

<Jessica> It wasn't about his aim or being lucky... I was too fast for them to hit me. It was my mistake that got me wounded.

<Shaw> Sebastian shook his head and was quiet.

<Jessica> "I know you think I'm missing your point..." Jess said quietly, lifting her head to look at him. "I'm not."

<Shaw> "It's not just about endangering the baby." He unclenched his fist to raise his hand to her cheek. "You warn me to me careful, that you fear the idea of losing me -" Meeting her eyes, his voice trembled as well. "I cannot lose you."

<Jessica> She turned her face into his hand, "You won't..." even though she feared that was a lie.

<Shaw> "Even if Sarkissian herself wouldn't risk actual harm to you -- which I doubt, frankly -- the rabble she employs wouldn't make the distinction."

<Jessica> "I know... you don't have to tell me that..." she sighed, "I'm sorry... I know it was stupid... but she said Hydra and I guess I just forgot about everything else..."

<Shaw> He nodded once, and fell silent again.

<Jessica> "I just thought she might be there..." she bowed her head back onto his shoulder. "She wasn't...."

<Shaw> His hand dropped. "...and if she had been?"

<Jessica> "I don't know..." she really didn't know what she would have done, she knew what she wanted to do but she doubted she'd be able to if it came to it.

<Shaw> "Are you quite certain of that?" He tried to study her face again, pushing away the mixed emotions he could sense through their link.

<Jessica> She shook her head, turning away from him. "What I should do, want to do and would do are all different things..."

<Shaw> "And what are those different things?" Now that she'd moved away from him he crossed his arms, backing up to lean against the counter.

<Jessica> "I want..." she shook her head, she didn't want to say it but she was sure the images flashing over their link would be enough.

<Shaw> The images were unsurprisingly violent. "And if she had turned the tables on you, as she has done to all of us? If she had taken you, and with you she'd also have our child?"

<Jessica> "I wouldn't have let that happen again." She folded her arms tightly, wincing a little at the pain from the bullet graze.

<Shaw> "Oh?" His eyebrow shot up as his voice sharpened. "Just as you stopped that bullet, yes?"

<Jessica> "It's just a graze!" Jess kept her back to him, her grip on her upper arms tightening which only made the pain in one of them worse.

<Shaw> "Oh yes, I can tell, by the searing pain radiating over our link." His tone dripped sarcasm.

<Jessica> "It's fine." She turned for the stairs to go up and get changed.

<Shaw> He stayed put. "It's irresponsible. You have to know that on some level."

<Jessica> "What do you want me to say, Sebastian?" she sat down to pull off her boots.

<Shaw> "That you won't do it again. I've agreed not to personally pursue her, and I don't think it's too much as ask that you protect yourself as well."

<Jessica> "Fine. I won't. I've learned my lesson. Happy now?" The uniform's pants were the next things to come off and she replaced them with jeans.

<Shaw> She couldn't see him roll his eyes, and finally he pushed off the counter and moved to the study. Resting his hands on the railing, he peered down from the peculiar balcony and into the bedroom, but from this angle he couldn't see her, either. The design of their new home would take some adjustment. "I can hear the genuine sentiment in your voice, my dear."

<Jessica> "I don't need a lecture, Sebastian. I'm not a child." Her voice was tense with irritation and she rested her hands either side of her on the bed, curling her fingers into fists over the blankets.

<Shaw> "No, you're not, so don't act like one." His voice still hadn't risen beyond his normal tone, but the frustration was evident. Moving to a window, he looked outside at the swirling snow. It was piling up quickly outside, judging by what he could see on the sill, and visibility was next to nothing.

<Jessica> "Do you think I'm acting like a child now?" she looked up at the ceiling, considering whether or not to go back up there.

<Shaw> Sebastian just stood, watching the snow and contemplating his response to this.

<Jessica> "Well great. I guess I know where I stand now." She pulled another pair of boots on and went to get a sweater.

<Shaw> Quickly moving back to the railing, he vaulted it, catching the ledge just long enough to slow his descent. He dropped into the bedroom, knees bent and feeling both the shock of the impact and the light surge of energy.

<Jessica> She paused only briefly when he made his entrance before she finished pulling the sweater on and headed for the door.

<Shaw> "Do you?" He moved to intercept her.

<Jessica> "Do I what?" She stopped when he moved in front of her but refused to look at him, keeping her eyes on the stairs instead.

<Shaw> "What do you think of your actions? Do you truly understand why I'm angry?" And terrified, he didn't add, but she must have felt it. "Or do you think I'm overreacting? Do you think I simply want to fight with you?"

<Jessica> "Does it matter what I think? I went, I came back with a tiny injury and I'm not going again. End of story. Anything else or can I go downstairs now?"

<Shaw> "Of course it matters what you think."

<Jessica> "Why does it matter? The result is the same." She pushed past him to head downstairs.

<Shaw> He was right on her heels. "If I wasn't interested in your thoughts, I wouldn't bother maintaining a link with you."

<Jessica> "Well right now I think I might go for a walk." At the bottom of the stairs she went to pick up her coat again.

<Shaw> "In a blizzard." His tone was completely flat.

<Jessica> "It's got to be better than staying in right now."

<Shaw> Sebastian's head tilted and he stared at her, eyes narrowed in thought. "I'll go then." He reached past her to his own coat.

<Jessica> "And leave me to wonder where you are? Because that'll be better than me sitting in the house with you mad at me all evening."

<Shaw> "You're injured and-" He cut off, jerked the coat on and moved past her to the door. "It's better me than you."

<Jessica> "You think I won't just go out after you? You know I think better when I'm outside."

<Shaw> "Then we both go," he said with a nod.

<Jessica> "And what would be the point of that? So we argue on the street instead of in the house?"

<Shaw> "Is there something else we need to argue about?"

<Jessica> "I don't know, is there?"

<Shaw> "You've heard all I have to say, Jessica." His hand was still on the door handle.

<Jessica> "And what do you expect me to say in return?" She was still holding her coat, "I've said I won't do it again, what more do you want from me?"

<Shaw> "That's all." Her sweater hid her injury, but he still felt her pain, and his eyes fell to her flat stomach for a moment.

<Jessica> "It's an adjustment, okay? I told you I wasn't ready." She easily followed his eyeline. "I'm trying..."

<Shaw> "I understand." He licked his lips.

<Jessica> "Do you? Or are you just pretending to placate me? I understand why you're upset, I do... but do you understand why I had to go today?"

<Shaw> "You want vengeance and justice, you wish to make her pay for what she did, and to make her suffer for it. I'm familiar with the feeling, yes." His lips twisted as his head tilted. "You saw how it ended for me."

<Jessica> "It's not just that." She leaned against the wall, folding her arms over her coat and holding it across her stomach.

<Shaw> "Then what is it?"

<Jessica> "You won't get it... there's no point..." her eyes found the floor and focused on it.

<Shaw> Shifting his weight, he watched her. "You will never know that if you don't tell me."

<Jessica> She sighed, moving back along the small hallway and into the room beyond to sit down, keeping her coat in her lap.

<Shaw> He followed, but left his coat on. There wasn't anything else to sit on in the room - Jessica only found a seat on a trunk still left in the room from the move. Sebastian considered giving her space and leaning against the wall, but as he doubted she would like him looming over her he instead cleared the other end of the trunk and joined her.

<Jessica> "I... I still feel responsible for what happened in New York..." she glanced at him briefly before focusing on a spot just past her knees. "And, if I didn't go and she was there and something happened that I could have stopped... I'd have never forgiven myself..."

<Shaw> Shifting closer, he slid his arm around her shoulders. "Why would I not understand that?"

<Jessica> "Because I should have thought about all the other things and I didn't.... I didn't think about anything but going with them..."

<Shaw> After a few moments to mull this over, he took a deep breath. "When she took you, I thought of nothing but getting you back, at any cost."

<Jessica> "But I shouldn't be thinking about things that way anymore. I know that... Except when this stuff happens... everything just goes out of my head...."

<Shaw> "Then perhaps this can be considered an object lesson -- something to remind you to stop and think before you act. My worst decisions are made within a split-second." Granted, some of his decisions made after much deliberation were also terrible. Essex came to mind, as usual.

<Jessica> "I don't know if that'll work... sometimes I think too much..." She turned her head towards him but didn't lift her gaze. "I'm sorry... I just... I don't know how to do this... I don't know how to be this person..."

<Shaw> "Well, it's something to work on, yes?" He rested his hand lightly on her arm, above the hidden bandage.

<Jessica> "Do we have time for me to work on it?"

<Shaw> Leaning forward enough to catch her eyes, he gave her a questioning look.

<Jessica> She sighed, "You know... before the next thing comes along and I piss you off again... before..." she cast her eyes down to her stomach, shifting in her seat.

<Shaw> "The matter at hand isn't how I reacted, although I confess I don't enjoy this feeling." His gaze moved to her stomach as well, following hers.

<Jessica> "What else do you want me to say?"

<Shaw> "That you are willing to work on it? That you're not just trying to placate me?"

<Jessica> "You know I'm not..." she moved to get up again.

<Shaw> He let her go, hunching over to rest his elbows on his knees and drop his face into his hands.

<Jessica> Jess moved to the window beside the front door to look out at the snow, debating whether or not to still take that walk. The weather was pretty awful. With a frustrated sigh, she hung her coat back up and crossed back through the vestibule to head upstairs again.

<Shaw> He looked up to watch her, tensing to jump up and follow into the wretched blizzard. He blew out a relieved breath when she returned her coat to its place. Watching her go, he then looked down at his own clasped hands. Which question had she answered?

<Jessica> Jess headed all the way up to the highest point in the building, the tower above the clock. The view of the city was usually really good but, with the snow, she could barely see the other side of the street. She didn't care, though, she was up there to hide more than for the view.

<Shaw> After a time, Sebastian stood. He waited there until the sounds of her movement ceased, than waited a bit more. When he went to the front door, he could feel the cold wind whistling through the cracks. That wind almost tore the door from his hands when he opened it, but soon he disappeared into the swirling snow.
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