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If it's not comics, tv, or movies, this is the place! Talk about anything and everything else right here!
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Crocodile Hunter
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Post by Crocodile Hunter »

http://www.actsofgord.com

the whole page is made by a guy "gord" who owns an videostore, theres lots of funny stories about him and stupid clients :LOL
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DeeJay
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Post by DeeJay »

I read this years ago but its still great. I love how he writes in the style of the bible.
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Post by Bamfette »

hah, that's great!

he's Canadian. this doesn't speak well of the general populace.

but i LOVED the marking of resumes.
"What are you doing?"

"I'm marking it."

"What?"

"Tsk, you spelled 'McDonald's" wrong."



"Here you go."

"Why did you put a giant 'F' on it?"

"Because there were 17 grammatical mistakes on your resume. You failed."


hee!

though, wtf is wrong with this guy?

http://www.actsofgord.com/Chronicles/chapter36.html

the poor kid... I mean, seiously... Bust a Move is TOO VIOLENT? Bust a move... it's... like Tetris... only cuter.

I find myself siding more with this father:

http://www.actsofgord.com/Annoy/chapter23.html (second one down) though perhaps not quite to that extreme, but i don't think swearing and such is harming kids, anyway. only when it is done without proper guidance, and the parents let video games, tv and the internet raise their children is it potentially a problem...

some people.
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Maelstrom
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Post by Maelstrom »

I worked in retail a long time, too. (I kind of view retail work as a social apprenticeship that everyone should go through, so they know how much is SUCKS to work behind the counter, and maybe have some sympathy for the poor devils.) Lord knows how many stupid, abusive customers I encountered. ("Hey, look! A master-slave relationship I don't have to pay $40 an hour for! And it's everywhere I want to buy something! Cool!")

I've added this to my list o' humor links, and now I'm spending inordinant amounts of time at work reading through this and trying to stifle my giggles. Damn you, keichi. :p
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Bamfette
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Post by Bamfette »

http://www.actsofgord.com/Chronicles/chapter39.html

I can so totally identify with that. we have Cherry Coke now, but up until, say, 2000 or shortly before, we didn't. It's only been available again up here for like 5 years, and even then, quite rarely. I remember going to Ontario to take the Animation drawing test at Sheridan, and seeing Cherry Coke at a local convenience store and being exceedingly happy. since then you can find it here and there... never checked the label for french though. perhaps it's black market. hmmm... (how deprived we are) the sad part is, we USED to, so they basically took away a product i liked for no conceivable reason. i thought the Coca-Cola company as a whole had discontinued Cherry Coke, but no... when i was, 18, i think, something like that, i went to California on a school trip, even though i had already graduated, the teachers invited me and two other former students to tag along because they knew we would be interested (touring Disney's animation studios, Hana Barbera, ILM speakers, etc.) and lo and behold, on the second day there, we went to Disneyland, and they had... CHERRY COKE! :o we drank so much of that stuff it was insane, and a friend of mine, Chad actually did bring back 2 cases to Canada.

edit: it would appear it was re-introduced in 1998 http://www.angelfire.com/fl/sesamstraat ... kredfrench

that sounds about right. I would have taken the drawing test (the first time, i took the test twice) late 98 or early 99. the kinda funny part is that the trip to California was in 1997, i just checked. a year later and it would have been nothing out of the ordinary. :p
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Shadywhisk
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Post by Shadywhisk »

Originally posted by Bamfette
I can so totally identify with that. we have Cherry Coke now, but up until, say, 2000 or shortly before, we didn't. It's only been available again up here for like 5 years, and even then, quite rarely. I remember going to Ontario to take the Animation drawing test at Sheridan, and seeing Cherry Coke at a local convenience store and being exceedingly happy. since then you can find it here and there... never checked the label for french though. perhaps it's black market. hmmm... (how deprived we are) the sad part is, we USED to, so they basically took away a product i liked for no conceivable reason. i thought the Coca-Cola company as a whole had discontinued Cherry Coke, but no... when i was, 18, i think, something like that, i went to California on a school trip, even though i had already graduated, the teachers invited me and two other former students to tag along because they knew we would be interested (touring Disney's animation studios, Hana Barbera, ILM speakers, etc.) and lo and behold, on the second day there, we went to Disneyland, and they had... CHERRY COKE! :o we drank so much of that stuff it was insane, and a friend of mine, Chad actually did bring back 2 cases to Canada.
That seems cruel and unusual to discontinue Cherry Coke in Canada. I absolutely love it! If you ever need me to smuggle some across the border, Bamfette, just let me know. ;)
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fourpawsonthefloor
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Post by fourpawsonthefloor »

Had to say I loved the site, showed the realm of human nature that some poor souls are constantly exposed to. Have my own "act of gord" to share.

A lady walks into the shelter, spots cute fluffy kitten in one of the kennels.

I would like to buy this kitten.

Alright, the kitten will be up for adoption in two days, it is a stray so we have to hold it to see if the owners come forward.

But I want it now.

Well, I'm sorry, we always hold them 4 days to give an owner a chance to find and claim them.

I don't want to wait, I want it now.

(OK logic isn't working.....try empathy)
I understand that you would like to take the kitten home today, but if you lost your kitten and we didn't keep it for a few days to give you a chance to find it and just adopted it out, you would be pretty upset. So we have to hold the kitten.

So you aren't going to sell me the kitten.

No.

Lady leaves after calling us a few choice names. Lady comes back an hour later.

Hi, I'm missing my kitten.

OK? (Like she doesn't think that we recognise her?)

She darts into the room, heading straight for the kennel with the kitten in it.

Oh, here he is, here is my kitten.

We are standing there looking at her in disbelief, but hey, two can play this game.

Alright then, do you have some proof of ownership?

Some what!

Proof of ownership, you know, like a vaccine record or picture of the kitten.

No! This is MY kitten. You'd better give him back....
goes on for a few minutes with lots of expanded language.

Sorry, without proof of ownership we can't let you take the kitten. By the way its a girl.

Hah! She left after cussing us out some more, but heck, you get that a lot.
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Post by Crocodile Hunter »

Originally posted by fourpawsonthefloor
Had to say I loved the site, showed the realm of human nature that some poor souls are constantly exposed to. Have my own "act of gord" to share.

A lady walks into the shelter, spots cute fluffy kitten in one of the kennels.

I would like to buy this kitten.

Alright, the kitten will be up for adoption in two days, it is a stray so we have to hold it to see if the owners come forward.

But I want it now.

Well, I'm sorry, we always hold them 4 days to give an owner a chance to find and claim them.

I don't want to wait, I want it now.

(OK logic isn't working.....try empathy)
I understand that you would like to take the kitten home today, but if you lost your kitten and we didn't keep it for a few days to give you a chance to find it and just adopted it out, you would be pretty upset. So we have to hold the kitten.

So you aren't going to sell me the kitten.

No.

Lady leaves after calling us a few choice names. Lady comes back an hour later.

Hi, I'm missing my kitten.

OK? (Like she doesn't think that we recognise her?)

She darts into the room, heading straight for the kennel with the kitten in it.

Oh, here he is, here is my kitten.

We are standing there looking at her in disbelief, but hey, two can play this game.

Alright then, do you have some proof of ownership?

Some what!

Proof of ownership, you know, like a vaccine record or picture of the kitten.

No! This is MY kitten. You'd better give him back....
goes on for a few minutes with lots of expanded language.

Sorry, without proof of ownership we can't let you take the kitten. By the way its a girl.

Hah! She left after cussing us out some more, but heck, you get that a lot.
Paws
:LOL now that was funny :LOL
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Nighton
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Post by Nighton »

I just love stories about idiots (or, as members of Dogbert's New Ruling Class like me like to call them: Induhviduals), and there was more than enough here!
Well, maybe not enough, considering that I can never get enough of that kind of stories,... But at least it satisfied the Nighton for a while.
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Post by Sussi »

:LOL Good site!

The storys remind me of when I used to work at a video rental store... One time there was someone who hade rented a movie (can't remember what movie it was, but it wasn't one of the newer ones) and returned it late... and insted of the real movie tape, he had put in a tv recorded tape of the movie... (whit tv channel symbol in the corner and everythng). :X

A nother annoynign thing (when we still hade the mature section, and more after...) was people who didn't speak any good swedish bring
there young kids and make them ask me if we hade any porno...
I want a Blueberry-Muffin!!!:lick (Read Uncanny Xmen Nr 423...).

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